The rain ran down the cold stone wall, flowing through sharp cracks between shards, and formed little gravel-bottomed pools at its base. Moonlight ebbed and flowed with the swiftly hurrying clouds, rushed onward by the warm, blustering breeze. A figure stopped, inhaling deeply, before moving off toward the low brush, followed by two others. Their long cloaks were heavy and damp, but scarsely caught or snagged on the grasping branches. The ground sprung lightly beneath their feet, with a rich smell of sap and fallen leaves, marbled with the sound of tiny streams, scurrying beneath the rough, grey boulders. The terrain grew steeper, low trees giving way to grass and rock. Cresting a sharp-topped rise, a long, thin lake, away and to their right, stretched off into the distance, its extent hidden as the mountains drew together. It was the water which guided them, though they never approached its shores and their thick blanketing of old forest. A few bites of bread and cheese, a drink from one of the larger streams, and they pressed onward, descending, later to rise again.

Hi everyone.

It's that magical time again. The time when the little number at the end of the date changes. We all get a year older, instantly. We begin a time of writing the incorrect date on important documents. Everything becomes fresh and new and wonderful and perfect.

Well, perhaps not.

So 2007 is rolling rapidly to a close, and many of us will take the opportunity to look back on the past 12 months and figure out what went right and what went wrong, which of our goals were met and which escaped us. Overall, are we satisfied with the result, or does the whole business leave us feeling somewhat lacking? I run into people who claim to live their lives without regret. They have that magical ability to make the best of any set of circumstances, to put a cheerful or at least productive spin on whatever comes their way. Or perhaps it's one of those people who know exactly what they want, and then just push constantly forward in pursuit of their goal. Alas, I fear I would be dishonest in numbering myself among those lucky souls.

2007 certainly had its high points. I got to visit twice with my friend Byron and his lovely wife, I reconnected with some family I hadn't seen in a long time, and I made a couple of important decisions that will hopefully help me to move forward in my life in the months to come. I wasn't diagnosed with any major illnesses, nobody close to me died, I put food on the table and a roof over our heads. The fact that I'm far from being satisfied with how things went perhaps says more about my hopes than about the objective reality. It's a gift to be happy with the way things are at any given moment, but it's necessary to balance that sense of satisfaction with the drive to keep moving forward, to keep learning and improving. Lines from a Leonard Cohen song keep coming to mind: "I saw a beggar, leaning on his wooden crutch. He said to me 'you must not ask for so much'. And a pretty woman leaning in her darkened door, she cried to me 'hey, why not ask for more?'"

And so I bid adieu to 2007, cautiously optimistic that 2008 will bring big changes, and that those changes will be good. I mentioned last December that I had only made 14 posts here all year. Well I managed to better that this year -- this post makes a whopping 16! I have so many hopes for this year, so many wants, most of which I will keep tightly sealed in my heart of hearts, for fear that they won't come true. I need to hold myself to a much higher standard in terms of actions and getting things done. I need to be productive and interested and interesting again. I need to move forward!

All the best to you. I hope that 2007 was everything you hoped it would be, and that 2008 will be even better. And for those who are sad or disappointed, all I can say is that in at least some ways, it's always possible to turn our lives around on a dime. We can keep learning, leave behind old baggage, look at things from a new angle, and just get up of our butts and be better!

Take care
-Justin-

Another video entry, taken during a nice, leisurely walk while I worked on my tan. A full post mortem of the Labrador trip should be coming soon, when I get a moment to collect my thoughts.

Take care
-J-

Here's our main success story from this trip:

It's for a new Ticklish Brother song called Close To You,
and it shows what is perhaps not the ideal way to demonstrate your
infatuation with someone. Byron was the main force behind the video,
though a large chunk was also contributed to by the wonderful young
people  (Haley Battcock, Trent Davis, Lucy Niles, Michelle Saunders,
and Curtis Williams) who came to our workshop on Sunday at the Labrador
Creative Arts Festival here in Happy Valley - Goose Bay. They learned
how to use the cameras, lights and sound equipment, then worked their
butts off to help us capture several crucial scenes. In addition to
Byron and I, the video also features the awesome Stephanie Flowers and
Fran the dog, with a very special cameo by Byron's father, Melvin. The
whole process took roughly 4 jam-packed days.

Enjoy!

Take care
-J-

No, not the alternately cuddly and murderous registered trademarked stars of stage and screen. The gremlins I'm referring to are those that have been plaguing the technical aspects of this trip. We have had a truly momentous list of devices that have crapped out in one way or the other. So many have misbehaved, and at such totally inopportune times, that it's kind of emotionally tiring. Every time we think we've resolved an issue, another one crops up. It's insane. I'm typing this now because the system has, at least for now, ground to a total halt. The software just sort of closes without warning in the middle of a take. So I'll try a couple of things and see what happens. Thankfully, we've gotten so accustomed to these ridiculous problems that we've already devised plans B through D (if you don't count all the plans leading up to this), so we'll just keep bludgeoning away until it's time for me to leave. That, unfortunately, is in... 11 hours or so. Fun fun fun. Wish us luck.

So it's October here in Canada (and pretty much everywhere else, I would assume) and we've had the air conditioner on all evening. Last year, the first snow here was October 12th. Of course, then it stayed mild and pretty much snowless right up until mid-January, at which point it made up for itself... Strange weather, though perhaps strange has become the norm these days.

The summer came and went. Had our annual trip to Newfoundland, which was nice for the family and nature time, but quite disheartening for the economic stuff. The economy in Corner Brook was bad when we left 5 years ago, but it somehow seems to have gotten worse. Left me with a feeling of rootlessness, since I don't feel at home here in Ontario, but my tangible ties to Newfoundland are growing more tenuous.

As the fall begins, I seem finally to be taking some steps to start my life moving again. I won't elaborate, but they're overdue. I'm having to let go of my fear that I won't choose exactly right, and realize that any movement is good movement. If I take this new path, and later on it turns out I want to change direction, at least I'll be moving and have acquired new skills and credentials. The present situation is pretty much a textbook definition of "going nowhere, fast". I'm a lot older than I thought I would be at this stage

My next exciting event on the horizon is another Ticklish Brother get-together. We'll be doing more recording as well as lots of video work and other things. Two solid, jam-packed weeks of musical activity. And this time, Byron's not coming here, I'm flying up to Labrador. I'm very excited! That'll be mid-November, so between now and then I have lots of song work to do, with arrangements and unfinished lyrics and such. It's a nice distraction from work, and I've always done best with a goal in sight.

And so life continues on its merry way. And I must haul my poor carcass off to bed. One more day of work and then my "weekend".

Take care
-J-

I guess it's all in the perspective.

At our local mall, at a booth in the middle of the hall, there's an attractive woman with a sexy foreign accent. This woman, when you walk by, comes over to you, speaks to you in a seductive voice, and then proceeds to rub lotion on you. I suspect that to a great number of men, this alone would be sufficient motivation to swing by the mall. Sexy lady.... free lotion rubbing...

To me, however, she's terrifying. With her eagle eyes, she scans the crowd, pouncing instantly on any unsuspecting shopper who ventures past. In a flash, before you even know it, lotion is being applied sensually to your hands or arms, sexily-accented verbiage is being tossed around, proclaiming the virtues of Dead Sea minerals, and, if she has her way, you're more than halfway toward a purchase.

I've never reacted well toward any kind of forceful marketing. At the slightest whiff of pressure, I head for the hills. I tense up when, as I'm browsing in a store, an attendant asks if I need any help with anything, and if I know that they're on commission I almost never even venture inside in the first place. If you're a salesperson, I'm not the one you're looking for. I actually shop very little, ouside of groceries. I buy used stuff whenever possible, always research a product thoroughly before considering it, and rarely make an impulse buy over 10 bucks. This comes from a lifetime of living with little money, and a desire to only buy things which I have a very good chance of enjoying. I don't do "retail therapy". Buying things stresses me out.

So when an attactive woman (I'm quite shy, and happily married) comes up to me and tries to sell me expensive (I'm poor) lotion (which I don't need) in a forceful way (help!), what you get is someone who now avoids that part of the mall. I figured she'd only be there a week or two, since that's how long most of the booths stay, but it's been almost 2 months now. If it's just a quick trip, I simply don't go into that section, and if I'm there a bit longer, I'll actually walk all the way around, down a totally different hallway, to avoid going past her lair. This takes almost 5 minutes longer, in either direction.

But the alternative is too frightening to consider.

Hello all

It's been a while since I've written. Life has been busy. Though it's still not official, summer has definitely been in southern Ontario for many weeks. Been grinding my way through work as usual, trying hard to lessen its focus in my life and make solid plans for the next phase. I'm meeting with more limited results than I would like, but I'll keep trying...

At the moment, my wife and I are a day into our annual Escape From Ontario. We're currently in Halifax, Nova Scotia. We're visiting friends and extended family here for a few days, then we'll be taking the ferry to Newfoundland and spending a week-and-a-bit with my mother and brothers. It's good to get away. It's nice to see people, get a change of scenery, and not have to go to my job.

Anyhow, I have to move along. It's time for an evening meal, and then some sort of wandering perhaps. It's rainy here, which has put a damper on our many outdoor plans, but we'll survive. Especially once we can find somewhere to buy an umbrella

Hope all is well with everyone.

Take care
-J-