October 23, 2003

  • Hi all


    Thanks to everyone who has wished us a happy return to Canada. It's good to be here, in a way at least. It's a big relief in some ways, but my status remains unchanged in a number of important ways. Part of me had allowed myself a little teeny bit of hope that some of the dark clouds currently overshadowing my little family unit would disperse when I got here. Unfortunately, that was not to be. We're still playing Sisyphus, endlessly pushing that rock up the hill, just waiting for it to roll back down.


    I don't mean to sound gloomy, but my life feels heavy right now. I feel kind of like a fly caught in a chunk of amber, unable to move forward in the present or to make plans for the future. I do have an exciting potential job offer for February/March, but I feel unable to let myself feel excited about it right now. It seems like all enjoyment is on hold, along with most emotion. I don't even laugh much anymore, and that's pretty significant since anyone will tell you that I laugh pretty much nonstop under most circumstances.


    But anyhow, no need to keep darkening your day with my current plight. I will ask the favour that you keep praying and sending out good energy our way. I know that we'll get through this, but that doesn't make it feel much better in the here and now. I'm going to go now and prepare for the rest of the day. Hope you're all doing well. Thanks for reading and caring.


    Take care
    -Justin-

Comments (23)

  • I will happily keep praying for you and your family and situation.

  •   My daughter, Robbiekay, and I have done some interesting studies about learning...she teaches ESL (Korea & Taiwan), me with music.  Set something to rhyme and rythm and it is almost instantly learned.  At the workshop I attended recently, we set Bach Inventions to words.  Mine were funny.  That ability to hear is a great talent.  I don't seem to hear as keenly as you, but I do "get it".  I'm thinking of you and your bride as you face difficult times.  God bless you.

  • you're much better off than a fly caught in amber because it's basically dead.  Fight the good fight and I'm sure all will be well.

  • Concentrate on the 'up' because that is the future.  The present is something you have to deal with right now, but it rapidly becomes the past.  Does that make sense?

    You know those faucets/taps that you see in displays that are everlastingly running water from a tap in the air?  I think the cake you describe would look excellent perched over it

    SavonDuJour is a new incarnation.  You knew me in my old one too, love Petra.

  • jeez justin!  I'll be sure to send you a noose for your birthday.  Hopefully by then things will have gotten more hopeful.

    -B

  • Welcome home to you and Crista Justin.

    I hope your situation inproves, soon. It's tough, isn't it?

  • I forgot to put a comma in that last comment. Ugh. I am so not on the ball.

    Speaking of flies caught in amber, have you ever read any of Diana Gadaldon's books?

  • Good site! Thanks for the comment. I doubt if my boss would confront a shark for me.

  • Great blog. Welcome back to Canada. Hopefully no place like home...

  • Hey I know how you feel. But you never know...I was really down and out and all of a sudden i got some great news that just turned everything around. I'm hoping that something somehow somewhere comes up so that you don't feel like you're in limbo. Best of luck in everything.

  • Take a deep breath and one step at a time.  I know this is difficult but that is the way to get started again.  Prayers coming your way

  • it's rainy day..and sunny day..and thunderstorm..as like as nature..It'll be fine day after rainy day..good luck..!

  • well, I'm so sorry life sucks currently.  HEY, at least you're smart enough to employ intelligent metaphors!  that's always heartening!

  • Crista here. It's wonderful to see so many people reading your thoughts and wishes! All the best,
    Love.

  • Thank you for the comment... wow, congrats to your THREE YEARS - I will be sure to swing by your site in December and wish you the best.

    Welcome back home to Canada and I know things will look up for you. Stay strong!

    Take care and have a lovely week!

  • thank you for the fabulous comment. I totally agree with you, I think having to be strong all the time would bite in a big way. I guess, in my own inarticulate way, what I was trying to say was that I realize that we all need help I just really value having the faith in myself that I can take care of myself which does include asking for help when I really need it.

  • please excuse my big ol case of self absorbtion in the above comment.  It is hard when you are so used to laughing and you slowly stop. I hope life feels less heavy soon.

  • It was good to catch up on your latest J.  I'm glad you're back in Canada. Be easy on yourself and know that everything will work out in due to time.  My thoughts and prayers are with you and Crista and your family.

    Best wishes,

    Michelle

  • There was indeed Korean food there, but I forget what it was called now. That is why I attempted to write down some Korean on the wall, so I hope I got it right. Thanks for stumbling onto my site, what brought you to my humble virtual abode?

    So you taught English in Korea? That is so cool, I aim to do that in China if I can, but i'd rather be a bit more fluent in Cantonese and Mandarin first. But only time will tell!

    Take care!

  • Glad you're back in Canada... hope everything goes well for you there!

  • what were you doing in korea? im part korean by the way and i found that quite interesting that you went there. =D

  • stop playing with your sisyphus sores.  It will only make them worse.

  • Thankx for the comment! So...How'd you come across my site? 

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